I've no pictures because yesterday didn't really snap alot. So just deal a blog post with some pretty pictures i got from weheartit.
So today is the 16th, one month ago, on this date, we broke. You remember? I do you know. Do you even know that i almost cried today in school when i see you? Do you know how happy i was when celeste said, you did glanced at me, Like for awhile. I've no idea why this could make me so happy, Maybe because today is a really special day for me. Somehow meant that we had broken up for like one month but i'm still deeply in love with you. How crazy can i be? I'm not going to do a flashback because i know if you do stalk my blog, you would start.. i've no idea. As promised, i would get over you right? :) I have said a million times i want to get over you but i'm freaking still stucked. Wtffuck.
How's my acting skills? Good? Do i look happy in school? I do right. :) I'm basically laughing, crapping every single minute. Because i know being sad wouldn't help forever. People thinks that i'm attracting your attention. Honestly, nope. I'm not. I'm really really really very sad. Up till this date. Want to know something? I've no idea why that silly boy. Insist of wanting you. When he didn't talk to you before. I lied to him i would find a better one for him. I told him that you wouldn't be his dad anymore. Am i too selfish by making a decision on my own? Would you mind me making this decision? Or maybe.. does he matter to you? You can don't bother about me at all. But you can't ignore him. You can hate me and don't love me. But you can't hate him.. He's the cutest boy on earth that need our love, Not only me & yours. But many other people. You yourself should know that he meant the most to me in the world.
Uhmmm, i think i'm going to do a little flashback. So that this blogpost would look lengthy which i want it to be lengthy. But i hope that my reader would read every single word on my blog, though i know it's really boring for you guys to read because basically, every single time. I would be talking about that girl...
#Flashback1.
Let's think back till the day i called you over for a drink. That was the first time i see you in your home clothes. Went all the way to Mrt station to pick you up. Didn't dare to walk up to you because... you're sitting on the floor OUTSIDE THE MRT. Brought up my courage or maybe can say my friends told me to go over. Talked to you & caught you smoking. So i asked for one too. HAHAHA. And you can't seems to find your lighter. LOL! Than while walking to my house, we brought you walk the effing long distance till i don't know where i was walking too! :x While walking back, we did talk a little la. But very awkward cause it's my first time talking to you. My maid had to get the drink so we went down AGAIN. & we got our drink and stuffs. We somehow drank and called Priscillia to come over. She cabbed down and i remember, i dig out my piggy bank money just for her cab fare. So this time round, we walked to cheers and got the drinks. It happen that i doesn't look mature enough so i'm not allowed to get the drink with you all :@ And we simply.. drink once we reached home and Priscillia really got super drunk and we nua go down to the fitness corner and smoke like siao. I swear effing funny. Priscillia did the stunt you did in one of your facebook profile picture. Than you do and looks like some.... HAHAH. Than we collapse at the fitness corner floor. We were basically lying on the floor. HAHA. In the end, we go back up and fell asleep for awhile but we woke up just to talk. HAHA. That wasn't really the best night ever we had, But that's the first night we spend together. But the second night was confirm better. No elaboration needed.
#Flashback2
Do you remember that day i came back from Malaysia in the morning but we plan to meet in the afternoon before you went for training but somehow you didn't receive my text. Blablabla~ But we did meet after your training that night. So basically i was at SSC while waiting for you to end your training. Obviously your sweaty and sticky. & it happen that i waited for you for a really really very long time at SUBWAY. So i'm really really really very cold that my hand literally freezed up. So when we meet, you held my hand. & asked " Why your hand so cold? " Hahaha. That was the funniest thing you ever asked me. I bet you also didn't remember you asked me that. & It happen that you're really sweaty and sticky but i didn't mind and i still find you smelling so nice. (Y) Than you started telling me how afraid you are to bump into your mother on the way back and say you want to let your hair grow. HAHAHA. That was the first time i send you home. & normally is boyfriend send girlfriend home want lorh. I special. I send her home because afterall, i'm older than her & i want to see her reaching back home safely.
- I love it when you asked why i don't dare to look at you. Haha. I'm really shy okay.
- I love it when you try to pester me to talk when i suddenly went moodless.
- I love it when you started talking non-stop.
- I love your hugs & kisses.
- I love it when you always give in whenever we quarrel.
- I love it when you try to make the relationship right.
- I love it when we walk really really really really slow & i wish time would stop.
- I love it when you compare my height with yours because i'm really short.
- I love it when you compare my hand size with yours, and mine is bigger & you said your finger went smaller. Haha. Sillygirl97
- I love it when you give me the effing blur look.
- I love it when you are such a sweet little girl.
- I love it when you pester me to go to see the doctore
- I love it when you call me dear and many other weird names.
- I love those promises you promised me.
- I love it that you gave me so much memories to think back.
Maybe to you all this seems little, to others too. But you never know how happy i was every single day when i'm with you even though we quarrel a lot. Honestly, no leh. We didn't quarrel a lot. Somehow you're the lamest and funniest girlfriend i ever had. I know you doesn't remember every single thing of our relationship because you really have bad memories. You're the first girlfriend i made so much promises and you're the first girlfriend i want to really last with. But it seems that, everything was dream and i accept the fact. :')
Basically & i really hope that today would be the last time i'm talking so much about you. Because i'm always breaking my promises because of our promises and memories. We had so much promises but we just broke those promises after those break-up. & now being a friend of yours is so difficult when you yourself told me what in Hongkong & in Singapore. Because what you said, is very different from what you are doing right now. :) Ohwell suan lerh. Because hoping too much would lead you into very very deep trouble & many misunderstandings. Okay proper blog post now....
School today was perfectly fine. Nothing much happen too, but i keep bumping into your friends and you. & when your friends saw me. I'm at a very bad state. :( Ohwell, lucky i'm not crying at that time. & i pray that she wouldn't tell you what she see. HAHA. Because, its really really really very unglam. HAHA. I went for remedial today. I'm such a good girl, don't you think so? :') Was whatsapp-ing cow the whole day recently. I've tuition later on. Maybe can ask her help me with my homework later on. :) I want to go for New Year shopping. :') Who want to pei me?!?! <333 Okay la. Today post really effing long. Hope those people who read wouldn't say that i'm attracting her attention because this blog post is supposingly what i want plan to blog today.
Day 11 - Another picture of you & your friend
Day 12 - How you found out about blogger and why you made one?
My brother told me about blogger and i like blogging a lot because it's the place that i can rant my feelings out.
Day 13 - A letter to someone that had hurt me recently.
Uhmmm. I'm going to be greedy. There's two person who i'll be writing this too.
1. My ex of course. :') AGAIN.
Thanks for hurting me because every hurt you gave me i learnt something new. I never regret falling for you because you're the most special girlfriend i ever had. I've no idea why is it so difficult for me to get over you but i'll really try too. But no promises. I know you are deeply in love with your current girlfriend now. That's the reason why i want to move on. As this whole blog post is mostly for you, you should like can know... how much you " once " meant so much too me. :) Lastly, last long.
2. Her. My friend.
I know everything i do you wouldn't be happy. But why must you expect so much from me. And you as my good friends should know that i have fucked up attitude, why can't you give in to me? And whose the one always apologising every arguments we had. Me ley. Did you ever once said sorry and try to listen to my part of story. You always say i don't understand you. Maybe i really don't understand you lorh. Than do you know that you yourself always do stuffs without thinking what would happen in the end. I'm really happy to see the change of attitude in you from last year till now. I didn't say i'm not happy for my friend at all. I know you always want to try to solve my problem with any of my friends/ex or whatsoever. But sometimes, you yourself doesn't know that you made the problem bigger and worser. Sigh, both of us now aren't putting any effort to make up our friendship this time. Am i tired of your xiao qi attitude? Are you tired of my moodswing and bad attitude? Everybody have flaws. We aren't perfect at all.
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